HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Hello, Upscale Party Readers.

In a few short days, it will be my

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As I explained in my profile, this blog will not only cover party planning and decorating, but will also explore living with major depressive disorder.

TRIGGER WARNING: SERIOUS DEPRESSION

Age has not been much of an issue with me until now. But I am having a really hard time with this birthday. Sixty is very decidedly NOT YOUNG. It's not even middle-aged.  I am turning OLD. 

http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk

Of course, 60 is nothing like it used to be. I am well aware that Baby Boomers, most of whom have already turned 60, have redefined age and that we can be active and vibrant for many years to come. Many, many blogs and books explain all the wonderful things about being 60. At the very least, they say, "It's better than the alternative!" The alternative, of course, being death.

But when you have suffered most of your life from very serious clinical depression, and when you are in "remission" from the serious stuff, you still suffer from dysthymia (a mild but never ending depression), you're not really sure that this is better than the alternative.

 

It's not that I want to die. It's that I want something to live for.

And everything that I have lived for either no longer exists,

 or is out of my reach.

I will explain in my next post.

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